It’s a scorching day in Denmark. Summer is here at least a month too early and I’m thanking global warming. It’s a great day to think about a certain phenomenon that very clearly separates Western (I’m thinking particularly about North European) culture from Eastern. Is it the pietistic and protestantic background? No. Is it the long tradition for democracy, human rights and mindless egalitarianism? No. Then what about the fair skin and the long summer nights? No, no and no.
I’m thinking of course about the way we use our balconies. You know those little appendages we hang on the outside of buildings, especially apartment blocks, so people can get the illusion of being outside while they’re actually still in their apartment. You see, they way we use our balconies here in Denmark is vastly different from the way they use it in other places – Iran being one place, but also just on the other side of the Baltic in Poland, and even in Spain (which I here somehow confuse into the East category). So what is the difference? It is the difference between balconies as “extended living room” and balconies as “useful storage space”.
On a hot summer day when you walk around in Copenhagen, you’ll see every Dane who has acces to a balcony actually using it as a substitute for going to the park – they’ll be smoking, drinking coffee, having breakfast, sunbathing, reading a newspaper, whatever, and meanwhile enjoying the fresh air and the sun. Danes who have balconies almost live on them during the summer. But people here in Denmark of – for example – Middle Eastern decent (who are technically Danes but have a different cultural background) will not, never, ever use their balconies for pleasure. A balcony is to be used as a storage space – preferably for lots of coca-cola bottles or other soft drinks.
This essential difference was perfectly illustrated a few months back when me and my girlfriend happened into one of those silly home owner shows on Danish television. Here a young Danish couple of (I think) Pakistani decent (but I may be wrong) just had bought a new apartment, and the home-grown Danish television crew had followed them on their quest. The couple were young, recently married, happy, well integrated, spoke perfect Danish and was in all ways succesfully assimilated into Danish society. And yet, when the Danish interviewer admired the couple’s nice new balcony and said “this is so great: the lilttle baby carriage can stand out there on hot summer evenings” the girl were visibly horrified! There was no way she was putting her little yet-to-be-born baby out there! “No, I think we’ll use it for the coke bottles” she said and brushed the idea off. The guy nodded and agreed – I can extrapolate he was thinking: “this was going so well, but these Danes are really nuts”.
Now, the really funny thing is that here my girlfriend laughed and said: “It’s exactly the same in my familiy!”. You have to know here that she on her mother’s side is Polish-Jewish with that whole part of the family living in Denmark. And here it is exactly the same: no one goes out on the balcony. It is for storing stuff, not for putting out plants and a nice little table to drink coffee at in the morning. So apparently there is this storage-culture all the way from Poland and down (we can assume) at least to Iran, where I again observed the storage-phenomenon.
What’s the explanation? I don’t know. It could have something to do with the climate (which doesn’t explain Poland, though), because in Spain they were also using their balconies for storage – for eggs no less! And then they would make home-made mayonnaise from eggs that had been outside in the summer heat for days and never seen a fridge since they left the chicken. How gross is that?
Anyway: Some people think that the rows of sattelite dishes pointed towards Mecca indicate that a lot of immigrants live in a certain place. Maybe so, but an even better indication is the boxes on the balcony, filled with soft drinks or eggs or whatever. Just take a look the next time you’re passing by!